It has been some time since I last posted on here huh? Is anyone still following me out there? Oh, I forgot, that was Twitter right? PHffff. Alot has happened since those joyful days of yesteryear. Isn't it just amazing how the world can change on you in one second. One minute you're naive and trusting and the next your just ready to kill yourself? I went though a lot of shit with David, which ended me up in suicide watch, which isn't very safe, by the by. I'm in the process of looking for more icons, cause I plan on making more posts here. Just to let you know, I will be jumping from one topic to another, I'm tired as fuck and can't stay on one subject for too long.

Since my last post here, I've dated another boy, which turned out to be just as disasterious as David. Luckily I found someone else before it ended up shitty. He is my boyfriend now and we've been together for a year and one month. Which is my longest relastionship, and I feel it will be my last. I don't need anything else as long as I have Him. But I suppose I should start with school first, since I have finally graduated. I was elected Senior Class President and Student Government Vice President. As much as it pains me to say, we as a senior class didn't accomplish much. But on the other hand, the SGA my senior year did much more. We got a lot accomplished, but I don't feel like going in detail about it, not now anyway. Perhaps I will at a later date. But we did rasie a shit ton of money for the school this year, since the teachers budget was getting cut, again. I don't understand this government. But that's a whole nother entry. I really should be asleep now, cause I have to work tomorow, or today rather, but I haven't been here in so long I wanna make a hella long entry.

I have had two jobs since my last entry, I'm the third key at my current job now. Which means I get to close and open the store. I have a pay increase and get more hours. I have gotten a car, which is financed, so I have bills to pay now. Why, oh why didn't I listen to my father when he told me now to want to grow up to fast? It seems like only yesterday all I had to worry about was studying and making good grades. Where in the hell does the time go, man? Now I've put myself on a budget to make sure I can make all my payments that need be made. I don't have a place of my own yet, but I feel that when I move out it will be with my boyfriend. We've spoken of it before, and we both feel that we're ready to go day to day with each other. At this point, we live about an hour away from one another and only get to see each other about once every two weeks. But it's better than nothing, as we tell each other. It's much better than not being able to see each other at all. He's such a sweet man, and yes I mean man. He's forty five years old. If you don't like it then get the fuck out of my livejournal.

I find it amusing the way society affects us all. What to wear, how to talk, how to think, what to say, what to believe, who to date. What's wrong and what's right. It just makes me wanna puke, but once again that's another entry. I won't rant about what I think is wrong with the world tonight. I'm much to tired to put the appropriate amount of energy into it. I'm not going to college yet either. I want to, but it's just not the right time. I have to pay my car off, and all that fun shit. But having the time to think about what I want to do with my life is wonderful. I don't feel pressured to go to college right away, becuase I know I can go later in life.

Well, that's my entry for now. It's time to go to bed, yo.

It's been alot time since I posted on here.  Alot of things have happened since November.  I'll just give everyone the short run down.  

I've fallen in love with one of the foregin exchange students at my school, he's from Slovakia.  We broke up a few weeks ago, he said that it would be better if we broke up now, instead of waiting until he left.  I don't know how to post pics on here or I would post one of us.  Classes are going ok, I'm doing better in chemistry, thanks to David. 

I can't think of any other reason why he woudn't talk to me.  He usually texts me atleast once a day.   I think something bad might have happened,  I hope it didn't and I very well may be wrong.  But how am I to know, we both live so far away from one another.  I would never know if he got into a car accident and ended up in the hospital.  I hope, so very badly that I'm wrong.  If I dont' get any reply out of him today I think I'm going to chance calling him.

Just thought I'd let ya'll know, that everything turned out fine.  My love and my friend both talked and worked everything out, even though my friend did get a little smartassy at times.  So everything was worked out and we're all happy ever after.

NOt alot has happened since last month, just alot of shit really.  One big thing is that I'm having relaltionship problems.  I'm caught between two men.  One I love with all my heart.  And I don't mean that fake love, like when highschoolers tell their boyfriend they will love them forever, I mean the type of love when you want to do everything in your power to make that particular person happy, and knowing that they're happy you're happy.  But he's really pissed at me now cause the other guy bought me a phone card so we would talk, and the one I love didn't really care for that too much.  Now all this shit is happening and I'm worried that he wont' love me anymore.  That's what I fear the most, losing love.  If he left me, I don't think I'd be able to handle it, and then bad things would happen.

I guess I'll just have to grit my teeth and prepare myself what will whatever will happen.  It reminds me of a quote I heard somewhere," Something evil this way comes." And that's what the situtation reminds me of.  It might not be something out right evil, but I know if he leaves me I'll just die of a broken heart.

Well, it's off to the orthadontist with me today.  I'm getting wires put on...yay...then it's back to school.  Which I was really hoping I'd be able to stay at home, but upon further thought, I decided it would be best that I go back.  I don't need to miss any more school than is absloutely necessary, because I will have more appointments. 

There's a bug in my room and I can't find him.....

>.>
<.<

It sounds like a Caydedid< *mauled that word*>  And it's driving my crazier....


Also, I got a copy of Halloween directed by Rob Zombie, I can't wait to watch it* is excited*  Not to mention I'm tyring to make paste/study/eat/mess online at the same time.  And also, I'm Secretary for Student Government Council.  *Yayness*  Now all I need is one of those skimpy little business outfits...*hehehe*

I get the pleasure of going to my family reunion tomorrow.  Oh the joy right?  I get to sweat to death, while old people talk about how things used to be when they were children.  Not that I don't enjoy listening to their stories, quite the contrary.  It's just that their is no one there my age and it gets rather boring.  Not mention one of my cousins is going to be there, and he's rather creepy....he watches me alot....get rather creepy after so long.  Like one time, I was laying on my bed, I was wearing a pair of my short short night shorts and a spagetti strap.  I had dozed off for a few minutes, and when I woke up I saw him just standing in my door way watching me.  Needless to say I started closing my door.

Anyway, back to the family reunions, I'll be gone pretty much all day and I still haven't decided on what to wear.  Oh well, I'll decide on all of that later.  

~Becky